This Story Was Written Purely for the Money
I’ve never met a dollar I didn’t like
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I just arrived home from a mani/pedi appointment, riddled with guilt.
I haven’t indulged in any form of self-care since before the pandemic. In fact, I’ve been wearing the same four pairs of sweatpants for two years. I don’t want to wear out my “good clothes” because those cost more than Walmart sweatpants.
The truth is that my mani and pedi cost the same as a tank of gas as of today. Yesterday the price at the pump went up to $1.91 per Canadian litre. For you Americans, that converts to about $973.00 per gallon.
On my way home I stopped at the grocery store and filled one bag with veggies and some whole wheat buns.
Thank GOD I don’t eat meat. And as of today, I’ve cut out cheese too. F**k that.
A single grocery bag containing vegetables and just four buns cost me over $40.00. That’s ten dollars per vegetarian sandwich that I’ll be eating for the next week.
I guess I’d better jazz that sandwich up with some mustard.
I’ll be creative and fill in my hunger gaps with salted potatoes or rice.
I could choose to drown my financial sorrows by watching some mindless $147.00 cable TV tonight. Might as well use it since I’m stuck in a contract and can’t even cancel it for free.
I could drop the insurance on my car and take my chances but….
The minute I’m uninsured I’ll probably swerve to avoid hitting a squirrel, lose control and take out the side of someone’s house.
I could borrow money from my retirement savings, however…
So, instead I’m going to sit here and stare at my pretty little pedicured toenails while drawing an escape route map from the next 7-Eleven I have to rob to fill the gas tank tomorrow.
Is anyone else out there just SO over the cost of living? As I mentioned in this story, I think Snow White was totally onto something.
My tip for you? Don’t eat yellow snow. Your tip for me? How about a coffee?
